June 24, 2007

Lane and Nancy Drew

In the New Yorker, Anthony Lane has some fun with Nancy Drew. His Drew review is a dialog between Emma Roberts, who plays Ms. Drew, and her Aunt Julia.

Aunt Julia smiled, something she seldom did in public for less than twenty million dollars.

Nancy has been telling Aunt Julia all about her new movie.

“It was splendid,” replied Emma, pausing to adjust the headband on her fine reddish hair. “The story begins in River Heights, a town full of delightful white people. I am motherless and my father is a lawyer, so both of us are rather sad! For a treat we move to Los Angeles, where the girls at my new school say I remind them of Martha Stewart.

She's moving into a big house that used to be owned by an actress.

Who plays the part of the actress?”

“The beautiful Miss Laura Elena Harring. After some ace detective work, I discovered that she was in a film called ‘Mulholland Drive,’ which dealt with similar material. Isn’t that coincidence just a little too suspicious? And the plot leads Nancy to a resort by the name of Twin Palms. Another clue! To sum up, a friend of mine said the film was like Lynch without the lesbians or the dwarves. What are lesbians, Aunt? Are they friends of Snow White’s, too?”

“More than you will ever know, dear.”