June 25, 2009
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Story Meeting

Suppose you were writing a screenplay about a guy. He’s the governor of South Carolina. Don’t worry about the details; it’s that kind of movie.

Anyway, the producer comes into your office and says,

We’ve got to shoot the third act in Buenos Aires. Or Paris. Either one.

You demur. “He’s the governor of South Carolina. How are we going to get him to Argentina?"

We can’t afford to shoot this in California. And Max says he’ll only go to Argentina. So, we gotta get him down under.


A junket. Trade delegation!

"We did that last year, with Sarah Palin."

A girl. He can be in love.

"But we’ve already established…"

Madly in love. Crazy.

"But he’s the governor of South Carolina. Max pops down to South America on a whim, everyone thinks he’s on a bender. I pop down to South America for a couple of days, who's gonna notice. You think they won’t notice that the governor isn’t governing? Or there?"

Of Thee I Sing, Baby!
You have got that certain thing, Baby!
Shining star and inspiration,
Worthy of a mighty nation,
Of Thee I Sing!

"He’s a politician. He’s spent his entire life being a politician. People talk about him as president. Who is going to elect a president that vanishes? And you think he doesn’t know? Sure, all the sexes from Maine to Texas have never known such love before, but who is going to give nukes to a guy who throws his entire life away for five days in Buenos Aires."

There is nothing you can name that is anything like a dame.